Movies I’ll Never See: Lambada

The film was released simultaneously with rival film The Forbidden Dance; neither was well received, though Lambada was called “the better of the two”

Synopsis – A Beverly Hills school teacher by a day, Kevin Laird (J. Eddie Peck) journeys at night to a warehouse in East L.A, where a group of barrio kids gather to dance the lambada.

Using his dazzling dance moves to earn the kids’ respect and acceptance, Kevin then teaches them academics in an informal backroom study hall. It’s the best of both worlds, but then Sandy (Melora Hardin) a jealous and lovestruck student exposes Kevin’s double life, his two worlds collide, threatening his job and reputation.



4 responses to “Movies I’ll Never See: Lambada

  1. i mean, of course kevin would lead a double life which would lead to his two worlds colliding, right? he needed to get all of that dry-humping out of his system because it’s prolly not appropriate to do it in the classroom.

  2. In light of recent news about teachers getting frisky with students, I’d think the school board would be thrilled that he’s dry humping off of school property.

    Dry humping is quite the elegant phrase. I bet it sounds even better in French.

  3. I believe the word you’re looking for is “frottage”

    As for the movies I’ll never see, my vote is for “Titanic”.

    As for movies that I wish I hadn’t seen, it’s a toss up between the execrable “Battlefield Earth” or the feculent “Santa Claus Conquers the Martians”

    I feel good getting those words out of my system!

  4. Well damn, frottage does sound better than dry humping, and it captures the meaning perfectly:

    “the practice of touching or rubbing against the clothed body of another person in a crowd as a means for obtaining sexual gratification.”


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